But just to play Keno

You tell people you're going to Reno, and they get all judgemental.

"Reno?! Nobody goes to Reno! Even little old ladies wouldn't go to Reno if the casinos didn't bribe them onto the bus with a roll of quarters and a buffet chit."

See people in the Bay area have this prejudice against Reno. They think if you have any class you go to Lake Tahoe.

Well, yeah, but if you go to Lake Tahoe, you know you're going to make a quick trip to Reno. It's only about 45 miles from the North Shore.

So you know you're going to be sitting there at the North Shore, being all genteel in the CalNeva Indian Room, and you're gonna say "Hey, who's up for some Keno and a free Village People concert?!"

And next thing you know you're blowing around those hairpin turns on Route 431, tailgated by a crazed Odwalla driver and promising to buy yourself a gigantic blender drink if you ever make it down the mountain alive!

But you can't have that gigantic blender drink, because you have to drive back to North Shore sometime during the Village People's warm up act. And who even knows who that is? Probably Billy Joe and the Heywoods or something.

And besides, there's plenty to see in Reno. It's not all $4.95 prime rib buffets and pawn shops, you know. It's full of history!

In fact, Reno is home to the National Automobile Museum, one of the coolest places ever! They have a 1933 Austin American, which I never even knew was a real thing! I looked at it, I said "Hey, that's like the car that Mickey Mouse used to drive around in! And Porky Pig! And Mr. Magoo!"

Well, apparently that's why it never caught on. It was lampooned so heavily in the cartoons and funny pages that American consumers just didn't take it seriously.

But anyway, the point is, you can always stop in North Shore first, on your way to Reno. That's what we did, me Tony and the Teenager. We met up with the Teenager's friend at CalNeva, right there on the state line. We had lunch, took in the ambience, and then we drove to Reno and checked into our room at the Silver Legacy, which was 46 bucks a night and bigger than my first two apartments.

We still had plenty of time to check out the Automobile Museum and take some pictures of historically significant stuff, like the Hotel Mizpah, which might look like kind of a dive but is actually on the National Register of Historic Places.

Then I went to bed, and Tony played Keno till One O'Clock in the morning. The teenager was also out till One O'Clock, but, since he's too young to drink or gamble, I assume he was just taking in some more of the area's cultural richness. I do envy him his energy.

Kurt "big daddy" True
12 august 2006