www.kurttrue.com, page 20


Cute Little Emails
Sun, 05 Dec 2004: One December years ago when I worked at the library on the Berkeley campus, one of those cute little chain emails showed up in everybody's inbox that was all about how you shouldn't eat in the library. And this email took the form of a song called "The Library is no Place to Eat," which was sung to the tune of "Santa Claus is Coming to Town."

Naturally this notion that you weren't supposed to eat in the library struck my coworkers and me as patently absurd. That's all we did was eat! We were bored, demoralized and stuck in mind-numbing dead end jobs. Some days, eating was the only thing that kept us sane.
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Auntie Lucylle Light
Fri, 03 Dec 2004: Yesterday when I got home from work, I decided I just couldn't keep the holidays at bay any longer, so I hauled out the Auntie Lucylle light.

The Auntie Lucylle Light is an object d'art that my great aunt Lucylle manufactured, as far as I can tell, with a string of multi-colored Christmas lights, a soldering gun and about a hundred or so medication cups, which she no doubt appropriated from the retirement home where she used to work in Ronhert Park.
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Thanksgiving memories
Thu, 25 Nov 2004: You want to talk about holiday pressure. On the 20th, the San Francisco Chronicle published a letter from me about my Grandma Rita's secret ingredient for stuffing, namely, a loaf of Columbo sourdough bread, carefully aged on top of the refrigerator until it transformed into a nearly indestructible granite-like mass.

Now the rest of my extended family is on my case to come up with the rest of the recipe!
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Hairy arms of death
Sat, 20 Nov 2004: My friends in the native plant movement like to tell you that when you plant natives in your backyard, you'll attract a wide array of indigenous fauna who appreciate the opportunity to live, dine and mate among their preferred host plants.

What they don't tell you is some of that native fauna can scare the living crap out of you!
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Having My Cake
Sat, 06 Nov 2004: One thing about my birthday cake, it has to be pink.

This morning Tony surprised me as I was walking out of the bathroom with a pink birthday cupcake. (Cupcakes are my second favorite thing to have for breakfast right after cold pizza.)
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Hansel & Gretel

Grandmas

Spider

Spider

Spider