Sweatin' to the Goodies

Well, like I said, they kicked me out of my old office, and I'm telecommuting today while they set up my new workstation in a cubicle by the fire exit.

Then they have the nerve to ask Jeffrey and Brenna what are they supposed to do with the five boxes of crap I packed up yesterday. You know, pencils and tape dispensers and books and googaws that had been my office since Lord knows when.

I'm sorry. Was I supposed to drag that stuff into the alley and set it on fire?

I don't know if it's the shame of being exiled in this cruel manner or the heat or what, but I just can't stop eating!

Just polished off a half a tub of ice cream, a bag of tortillas with some of that Trader Joe's jalapeño cheese, some health-food-type knock off pop tarts, a bowl of cereal. Ummm… let's see… a nectarine, a bananna.

There's just too many distractions at home. That's the problem. I keep thinking I should go out there and pull some weeds and prune the grapes. Well, you know, especially since I probably put away about twenty-five-hundred calories just from the time I turned off "Good Morning America" until Dr. Phil comes on.

Wait. Does Richard Simmons still have a TV show? Because I could use one of those heartfelt talks of his. You know, where he's looking right at the camera and there's some Yanni or something playing in the background?

Maybe I have a video.

Kurt "big daddy" True
25 july 2006