Black is Beautiful!

It took 44 years, but the Easter Bunny is finally following through my licorice-first jellybean policy.

It's not that I have a problem with other jellybean flavors. I can even get behind some of the really unconventional Jelly Belly flavors. Kiwi, mango, popcorn. No problem.

But as I see it, the black ones are really the sina qua non of jellybeandom. I can remember as a kid, digging through the plastic grass in my Easter basket to get to the black jellybeans. Then I'd trade away everything in that basket that had any street value to my school friends for black jellybeans.

I was a fool. My friends all hated licorice jellybeans. That's what they all told me after we grew up and started high school and the thrill of conning me out of my chocolate bunny and marshmallow eggs faded.

I've always liked the funny foods that nobody else likes, though. Licorice, marzipan, giblets, eggplant, fried spam, escargot, anchovies.

In fact, the only thing I won't eat on a pizza is pineapple.

You have to draw the line somewhere!

Kurt "big daddy" True
27 march 2005